Colossal Yes – Acapulco Roughs
Ba Da Bing Records
February 28, 2006

What It Sounds Like:  Lush piano melodies and lazy afternoon woodwind arrangements from the ex-drummer of Comets On Fire.  If you were chilling around with Mr. Rogers  and decided to go on over to the Neighborhood of Make-Believe, something about the off-center sounds on this record makes me think you might hear it echoing throughout the town.

I picked this up because I liked the cover artwork, hoping that the tunes were equal to the visuals.  Thankfully, the music on the debut Colossal Yes record is at least somewhat tolerable.  It actually falls nicely upon your ear at times, and would do well to find you lazying around on a Sunday after church in the mid-afternoon.  But remember – “at times” is the key word here.  It gets boring after a while – and repetitive.  Even more so, the downside, sadly, is that the sole member of Colossal Yes cannot sing.  The first clue was this:  Utrillo Kushner was the drummer for Comets On Fire.  Yes, the noisy, jamming, Pink Floyd-esque rockers.  Why did this dude so badly want to branch out and start writing tracks like A Fig For Misfortune?

A…..FIG?

Is this the 1800s?  Why does this song make me want to dress up like an old fat king and walk down a dirt road while reciting sonnets about my lady?

He’s trying his darndest though to get through on these songs.  He whimpers and whines through most of these tracks, most notably Between Ass And Ophir, which features a boring, bouncing piano melody over his dull vocal delivery.  Where is the Black Death when you need it?  It’s not here, but its needed – badly.

One of my least favorite phrases in the English language is this:  so annoying.

“Do you hear how much that person talks?  Gah.  It’s just so annoying…”

“It’s just so annoying how they always forget to give me extra ketchup packets when I ask for them…”

(Insert any commonly disliked, but not overly important in the big picture, scenario here)….”It’s just SO ANNOYING!”

I’m shooting myself in the foot here, because I’m pretty much saying that I’m annoyed by how much people say that they are “so annoyed” at things.  I’m simply saying to look at the big picture.  Be positive.  Stop letting little things get to you.  If we all weren’t so annoyed at stupid, insignificant things all the time, the world would be a better place.  Cheer up!

Now, if there is any stronger phrase than “shooting myself in the foot”, it would apply to the lone sentence in the next paragraph that I am about to type.  It’s a crap double-standard to admit, but I can’t deny, this one time…

This dude’s voice kinda annoys me.

3/10

If you had to listen to two tracks:  Just Like A Mademoiselle / O’Crocus Shall Be Raised